My Book Contains "No Artificial Growth Hormones"
I dont usually get too excited about what I read in the news. After all, what can I do about it But one item I recently saw made me jump up out of my chair.
I rushed over to my clever lawyers office.
"Look at this!" I proclaimed as I burst into his office.
Clever Lawyer said nothing. His client echoed his words with her ruby red lips.
I placed the newspaper on his desk.
"Happy Guy, what are you doing here" he wanted to know. "We dont have a meeting."
"Just look at this headline." I demanded, ignoring his irritating obsession with minute details. "We should take action immediately."
Slowly, Clever Lawyer picked up the newspaper and read the headline. His eyes returned to me. "This says that Monsanto is suing Oakhurst Dairy for labels on their milk reading no artificial growth hormones. What does that have to do with you"
"Dont you see" I asked incredulously. "Monsanto makes rBST, an artificial hormone for milk cows. It looks like they think the label on Oakhurst Dairy milk hurts their business because it implies that milk from their hormone-treated cows is inferior."
"I dont see what it has to do with you," Clever Lawyer said.
"Yes, I dont see what it has to do with you," Ruby Red chimed in.
"It has everything to do with me," I replied. "Look here. See this book about happiness Top Publisher printed New York Times Bestseller right on the cover. Can you believe it"
"Oh yeah, Ive heard of this book," Clever Lawyer smiled. "Its supposed to be quite good. In fact, I recall seeing it on the New York Times bestseller list."
"Exactly," I exclaimed. "Lets sue Top Publisher for everything hes got."
"Why" Clever Lawyer wanted to know, much to my surprise.
"Yes, why" Ruby Red also wanted to know.
"Because he is claiming his book is a New York Times bestseller," I explained in exasperation.
"But it is," Ruby Red pointed out.
"Thats not the point," I complained. "Their claim implies that my Get Happy Workbook is somehow inferior because it is not on the New York Times bestseller list ... yet."
"Um ... your Get Happy Workbook" Clever Lawyer asked.
"Isnt that an e-book"
"Yes it is."
"I dont think the New York Times lists e-books," Ruby Red noted.
"It doesnt matter," I insisted. "Top Publisher should be forced to remove such an offensive claim and to pay me damages for thousands of copies of lost sales."
"But you cant do that," Clever Lawyer exclaimed.
"Thats right. You cant do that," Ruby Red repeated.
"Why not" I asked.
"Because their claim is just a statement of fact."
"So is Oakhurst Dairys," I pointed out. "But that doesnt stop Monsanto from suing them."
"But youre not Monsanto," Clever Lawyer explained. "Monsanto is a biotech giant, and biotech companies are always being accused of making Frankenstein fruit or veggie eunuchs or other such delicacies."
"Thats right," Ruby Red joined in. "Even Viagra couldnt make a man out of one of those cucumbers."
We both stared at Ruby Red in surprise. The color of her face instantly matched the color of her lips.
"Look, Monsanto still has to prove its case," Clever lawyer warned. "We have no idea if they will. You would have to prove your case, too. I have a pretty good idea that you cant, since the New York Times does not list e-books."
"So, you are saying I should not sue Top Publisher for claiming his book is a New York Times Bestseller," I concluded. "Instead I should sue the New York Times for not naming my e-book a bestseller"
Personal Injury Settlement
Personal Injury Settlement is an art, not a science like many personal injury attorneys may think.Understanding all of the moving parts and motivation of all parties interested in the settlement process may be the most important aspect of achieving the highest settlement amount for a client.Companies like Global Financial, which provide cash advances against personal injury and worker compensation cases in 48 states http://www.glofin.com can help with the settlement process.There is nothing worse than a financially desperate plaintiff when trying to achieve the highest settlement offer.
How Pre-Settlement Lawsuit Funding Works
An injured person contacts a company that offers pre-settlement lawsuit funding, sometimes at the suggestion of an attorney. The finance company contacts the lawyer who is handling the case, and obtains information about the case. Based upon that information provided, the loan company estimates the value of the likely eventual settlement or verdict, and offers a cash advance to the injured person based upon that estimate. The fee may be a flat fee, or a monthly fee that accrues each month the loan is outstanding. When the case settles, or the defendant pays after losing in court, the loan and associated fees are paid to the finance company.
Protect Your Job & Wages
When people call me about employment issues they dont realize one important law- in almost every state you are terminable at will.That means that your employer can fire you anytime and for no reason at all.The only way you are protected from being fired on the spot without notice is if you have a contract of employment.A contract of employment must be in writing and should specify your length of employment, salary, terms of employment, vacation, bonus calculations, the basis of termination and any warnings to be given make it at least 3 warnings if you can prior to termination and must be signed by your employer, among other things.
Debt Consolidation.Just lump it all together!
In a world where people use credit as much as they drink water, it is no surprise that so many people need debt consolidation loans. Debt consolidation loans sound like a good way of getting your debt cleaned up, but are they If you need help getting out of debt, consider all your options before choosing. You will be surprised to learn what is available to help you.
The legal system in America is currently stretched with more personal injury lawsuits than it can comfortably process. Many insurance carriers are taking a stronger stand in the settlement process which increases the length of time to resolution in many cases. The victims of personal injury are being hurt the most by this reality because they are often out of work and have difficult time making ends meet until they receive a settlement or judgment in their case.
How to Select a Divorce Lawyer
Selecting a divorce lawyer to handle your family law case is a very important decision.The following are a few important criteria to help in finding the right divorce lawyer.
Anatomy of a Lawsuit
Should I Appeal My Social Security Disability Denial
YOU APPLIED FOR SOCIAL SECURITY DISABILITY AND YOUR CLAIM WAS DENIED AND YOU WONDER IF YOU SHOULD APPEAL
Divorce: Coping With The Family Law Process
I Comply, You Comply, We Comply ... Are You Sure
Failure to follow corporate formalities may expose corporate officers, directors and shareholders to personal liability. Maintaining good records, including corporate minutes, on a timely basis goes a long way toward maintaining the limited liability benefit of a corporation.
ATTENTION ATTORNEYS: Your Clients Case Was Worth $500,000 But They Were Forced to Take $200,000 Because They Couldnt Pay Their Own Bills.
Your Social Security Approval Package Finally, the Long Wait is Over!
Back and forth to the Disability Determination Services DDS… Arranging and rearranging data and documents for applications, appeals and motion of requests… Monthly contacts with the Social Security Administration Claims Rep and the DDS examiner… After endless consultations with your legal counsel or representatives, after many, many series of medical consultations and examinations, and finally, after too many false hopes and expectations… Your patience and determination has been rewarded! You have received the ultimate information relating the approval of your Disability Benefit claim!
Get a Prenuptial Agreement before Your Next Marriage
While signing a prenuptial agreement can be one of the all-time romantic turnoffs, for people heading into their second marriage, a prenuptial agreement can give the trade-off of a better relationship through the security of financial and life planning.
Checklist for Hiring a Private Investigator
Looking for an old friend Want to know if your spouse is cheating Need to check out a potential tenant or employee
Five Reasons Why I dont Have a Will
One: I hate my children and want them to never speak to each other again after the battle over my estate.
The Right Focus on Tort Reform
The recent headlines about Mercks Vioxx withdrawal and the FDAs move to ban ephedra have brought a lot of media attention to the growing area of drug litigation.
Why Litigation Is Nothing More Than A Business Tool - 26 Unbreakable Rules of Litigation!
From Bill Gates at the end of the last century to John D. Rockefeller at the end of the previous century; from Rick Scott, founder of Columbia Health Care, to AT&T: from Richard Branson and British Airlines to Dan Peña and The Financial Times; from government, banking, insurance and every other facet of world commerce - to grow geometrically and stay around, litigation must be prudently used and mastered.
Multiple Social Security Beneficiaries
Supplemental Security Income SSI is a federal program run by Social Security Administration that gives a monthly income to people with disabilities, blind, or who are 65 or older with limited income and property. Recipients must be a U.S. citizen or a national with countable income below the federal benefit rate or FBR.
Why You Need a Home Loan Countrywide Loan
From a small office in 1969, home loan countrywide has achieved recognition among consumers and investors as one of Americas leading home finance companies. Evidence of growth and industry leadership is home loan countrywides inclusion in the S&P 500, Forbes 500 and Fortune 500. Home loan countrywide began with a vision - to make the dream of homeownership accessible to everyone. Over the years, the company has grown, as have the ways in which they serve their customers. They have leveraged their skills in mortgage banking into diversified businesses that work together to provide customers with a complete range of financial services under one roof. Their diversification includes capital markets, insurance and a recent expansion into banking services with Countrywide Bank. In addition, home loan countrywide is also bringing a brand of financial services and customer satisfaction to the United Kingdom.Home loancountrywide is involved in the development of world-class proprietary financial systems has provided them with a sizable competitive edge and given them a front-runner position in penetrating financial services markets both domestically and internationally.
Case Watchers Make It Easy To Keep Up With Criminal Trial News
Nothing is more frustrating than trying to search for news about a specific trial, especially when the mainstream media isn’t interested.Now, Case Watchers keeps readers apprised in an easy to read format.
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