The Simple Facts About Falling In Love
We are meant to live a life of love. However, no matter how successful some are in other aspects of their lives, they don‚??t feel it‚??s realistic to have the same success in love.
But being in love is the most realistic thing you can do. It energizes your life, fills you with positivity, creates generosity and makes every moment beautiful. The body heals the heart is happy. The real question is, why aren‚??t we in love all the time? What keeps it away?
The following steps will show you how easy it is to open your eyes and find love wherever you go. .
1) THE ONE RIGHT BESIDES YOU
Most of the time we are searching for the right person and don‚??t take a moment to stop and see who is right in front of our eyes.
- Look at a person who is close to you right now ‚?" anyone it happens to be.
-Notice the ways in which you push him away. Stop doing that.
-Allow the two of you to be together in whatever way you are.
-Do the same thing tomorrow with someone else.
We dismiss so many people who are in our worlds, while waiting for the ‚??right one‚?? to appear. The more we can be ‚??right‚?? with everyone, the sooner we‚??ll find just what we‚??re looking for.
2)PLAYING AT LOVE
So many complain that they are not loved. The reason for this is they are so busy playing games their partner never knows who they really are.
-Notice what games you play in relationships, and what games you demand others play. See if you are in love with the person, or with the game you are both playing right now.
-Become aware of the difference between who you are and the games you play. Let the games and be who you are. Who you are is always loveable. It‚??s the games that get in the way.
3)LETTING HIM COME AND LETTING HIM GO
-One obstacle to falling in love is the tendency to hold on to what is wrong. We grasp and cling to whatever we have, preventing the right one from coming to us.
-When someone comes into your life (or day) practice letting him come.
‚?"Enjoy him/her for whoever he is.
-When it is time for a person to go, practice letting him go. Do not turn this into an experience of rejection or loss. It is simply time for him to go.
- Do this with yourself as well. Let yourself come and go freely, not tying yourself in chains. The more we free others and ourselves, the more easily we fall in love.
4)PUTTING YOUR BAGGAGE DOWN
Many feel that love is not possible unless all their demands are met. They can be quite amazed to discover that these demands don‚??t lead to happiness. They may even be obstacles to falling in love.
- Take a look at what you feel is absolutely necessary in relationships. Realize this is baggage you are carrying that may be keeping all kinds of people and possibilities away.
- Let one of these demands subside. At first let it go for just one day. (Remember you can always take it back again). Now try another day. The more you do this the more lighter and happier you will feel. And the more space you will make for all kinds of new people, possibilities and situations to come your way.
-What gifts do you give others in relationships? And what do you hope to receive in return? It‚??s important to give openly as well as to receive.
- Find something new you can give to somebody. Give it. Do this everyday. It does not have to be fancy or expensive. Do this with all kinds of different people. Do it quietly without fanfare and without expecting something in return.
- Do this with yourself as well. Each day take a moment to find out what kind of gift you would like today. (A walk in the park, new lipstick, time with someone you care for.) Give this to yourself each day. Although this exercise is simple, it is extremely powerful. Doing this daily in your relationship can turn everything around. By living with this open, generous mind, all kinds of other gifts come to you naturally.
6) MAKING FRIENDS WITH YOURSELF
Many say they are lonely, even with a partner at their side. This is simply because they have not yet made friends with themselves. Once they make friends with themselves and are able to be who they are, loneliness disappears.
Make friends with yourself. Spend time noticing who you are. Accept all parts of yourself. Stop judging and rejecting what is going on inside. Understand you are perfect just as you are. Then choose to do the same in relationships. Choose to have relationships with those who want and appreciate just what you are.
Brenda Shoshanna, Ph.D., psychologist, speaker and author is a long term Zen practitioner whose work integrates Zen and everyday life. The relationship expert on i.village.com, she is the author of many books. The most recent is Living By Zen (Timeless Truths For Everyday Life), http://www.livingbyzen.com Take a minute to go to this site to learn more about the book. Dr. Shoshanna is also the author of Zen And The Art of Falling In Love, (Simon and Schuster), Zen Miracles, (Finding Peace In An Insane World) and many other books. She can be reached at email@example.com Her personal website is http://www.brendashoshanna.com
Extra-marital Affairs...Yes or No!!!
Extra-marital Affairs?Yes or No!!! (Think and Tell)
The Male Rating System
While not necessarily New Age in nature, Samantha has noticed a lot of clients asking questions about their potential beaus lately and she thought this refreshing change might be just what was needed to help our female Realm members keep things in perspective regarding their male paramours. Enjoy! -David -
The Flames of Love
Suppose you have everything; a good job, good health, good reputation, good relationships and lot of money to spend. But still there is something missing from your life. Guess what? The LOVE. It is not something which you should ignore. Life without love is just like body without soul.
Relationship Advice: Closeness and Connection
In my work with couples, certain themes have emerged that can help us understand how a couple that was once close can drift so far apart.
From my own personal experiences with relationships I believe in a concept that I have been working with, at least in my mind's eye, which is to give generously of yourself in your relationship. Always do what you can for your partner to make him or her happy, regardless if they invest in you. I call my concept "The Concept of 100%". As a result of this I was happy, and never felt bad when I had to separate myself from a relationship. I believe that when you invest your 100% percent's worth, you never gets hurt, or at least not to the same extent as when someone didn't. The question will always come to mind "What if I had invested more into the relationship?". I do not like this statement and have always tried to avoid it. This concept came to my rescue. I grew to be a better person from my experiences. I don't regret a thing.
Gay Breakups: When the Rainbow Ends
10 Ways to Seduce A Woman
I have written this article by request but want to begin by saying that I in no way encourage men to treat women like objects. Men, this is a guide to help you win over a woman that you have a genuine interest in. If you are just looking for a one night stand then this article probably won't help you much. Lesson one, satisfaction comes with a sincere relationship and learning each others likes and dislikes. That being said, I hope you find something useful here that will help you give the woman of your dreams a reason to look your way. Be sincere. Compliment her on something you truly admire. Hollow compliments can often be sensed. A compliment that she knows you mean will have much more impact. This doesn't mean you can throw out a compliment and then get naked, but it is a good first step. The compliment should NOT be 'you have great knockers.' Go for the eyes, hair, intelligence, sense of humor, something along those lines. On the other hand, too many compliments can come off sounding insincere. One or two sincere compliments are best. Listen to her. She will give you clues about what she likes. At some later time, you can show that you remember what she has said and it makes a difference to you. This will earn you big points. Be real. Don't exaggerate to make yourself sound better. Don't tell her lies just because you think it will help. These things have a way of turning around and biting you. Don't offer advice unless asked. It could come off sounding like you are telling her what to do. Just listen and be supportive. Do not talk about sex unless she brings it up. This one is pretty self explanatory. Don't act desperate. Just let things flow naturally. Desperation is an unappealing quality in either sex. Playing a little hard to get can actually be appealing. Avoid talking about yourself too much. Let her talk and if she wants to know, she will ask. An ongoing conversation about how big your muscles are or how fast your car is will not score many points. Bragging about how well endowed you are is a big no-no too. On the other hand, silence doesn't work either. Look around and find something to talk about. Preferably about her. Avoid letting your eyes wonder to other women when you are with her. Talking about other women or your ex are both no-no's too. If you are out with her, let her know you like being with her by respecting her feelings and keeping your eyes and mind on her. Treat her with respect. Don't call her chick, broad, dude or any other name unless you have been together for a while and you come up with pet names for each other. Respect is crucial and a good woman will not be interested in sex with you until she knows you respect her. If a one night stand is what you have in mind, then don't lead her into believing you want a relationship with her. Playing with her feelings is cruel and something no one should do to anyone. Don't make her feel like because you have spent money on her, she should sleep with you. Making her feel this way will generally have the opposite affect. All you have bought is her time and the opportunity to prove to her that you are worth a second look. The rest is up to you. ©2005 Patricia Fason
When A Two-Salary Income Fails
While this may not apply to everyone, you may find that a second salary brings in substantially less than you thought it would. In the beginning, Rachael thought that since she and her husband were just about breaking even as a couple, that staying home with the new baby would not work -- infant needs seemed endless. So she went back to her old job.
Are Women From Utopia And Men From Wal-Mart?
It is surprising how many writers, psychologists, or scientists have made it their life's work focusing on the gender differences. In our male-dominated society it is no coincidence that men have undertaken the bulk of this work. They made an effort to help men and women get along, but deep down the sexes are much more alike than the world cares to admit.
If You Love Me
If you love me, you will keep my commandments?
Affairs: Advice for the One Who Strayed
To the spouse who had the affair, it's time for what I call a multilevel apology.
Secrets Your Husband/Significant Other Dont Want You to Know
1. He Only Pretends Not to Listen.
Find Your Love as Early as Possible
Life is made of innumerable dots. Dots, which are part of your today life, will connect with tomorrow dots.
For Better Or Worse
For Better or Worse
Loving Without Losing Yourself!
You are in love and it feels wonderful. This love is different and you are prepared to do anything to make it last. To prevent this ship from sinking you work hard to steer this relationship into a safe harbor. In the process you lose yourself and your romantic relationship becomes all-consuming!
3 Stone Diamond Rings ? Three Times As Nice!
It is said that the stones in 3 stone diamond rings represent the past, the present and the future. Just as a couple unite these things when they join together in marriage, so three stone diamond rings represent perfectly all that has made each partner what they are today, the present moment that they share, and the future into which they now walk together. Just like the ring itself, the three stones in 3 stone diamond rings celebrate the timelessness of your relationship.
The greatest asset we have in human existence is our soul growth, but somehow we have that confused with becoming powerful. Power does not bring growth unless we understand the essence of sharing that power.
Rediscovering Love and Intimacy
Wendy started counseling with me because Terence, her husband of 14 years, had just expressed to her that he wanted to end their relationship. Wendy, terrified of being alone, was panicked. Within a few minutes of speaking with her in a phone session, I understood exactly the underlying cause of their relationship problems.
Infidelity Excuse: I Fell Out of Love... and Just Love Being in Love
I find this dilemma rather common for younger couples, probably mid or late 30s and younger.
Prison Wife: Stand By Your Man
There are approximately 2 million men in the prison system in the United States. That means there are a lot of loved ones left behind to wait...wives, girlfriends, lovers, sisters, brothers, mothers, fathers, and yes, even children. Only the strong can survive this ordeal.
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