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Relationship Information
Don?t Snuff Out Expressions of Liking
It is hard to express all the emotions to somebody whom you love the most.
Although one wants to share all those things which he/she has in his/her heart. But one can do nothing, whenever he/she goes to the person whom he/she loves the most.
Relationship Advice: After the Break Up - Creating an Exit Door in Your Heart
Q. It's been over a year since the guy I thought I would be married to broke up with me. He said he was just scared to make the commitment. I felt like I tried really hard and did the best I could in this one. Sometimes it feels like just yesterday. I can't seem to get over this no matter how hard I try. I'm afraid that there will never be anyone else that I can get that close to or who will understand me. I keep trying to figure out where I went wrong.
Relationship Advice: 9 More Must-Know Tips for Couples
The Law of Two Questions
Relationship Tips 101
In this article I?d like to share what the research shows as being very helpful for keeping relationships strong and connected. Since 1973 Dr. John Gottman has been studying what he calls the ?masters and disasters? of relationships. From these studies he has been able to predict with 90% accuracy which relationships will last, and which will fail. Dr. Gottman (1999; 2005) suggests the following tips to keep your relationship strong:
The Secret Power of Romance and How It Can Work for You
There are some men who will never understand the importance of romance. They may be lazy or don?t feel like investing any of their time for something silly like romance. They?re the foolish ones who are wasting time and energy trying to get what they want the hard way.
Celebrate Friendship Day with Fresh Flowers!
Send flowers this Friendship Day, Sunday, August 7th! Across the street or across the country, a local florist can send a gift of Friendship to your Special Friend!
Attraction vs. Love
When we first meet someone, regardless of the way or medium that we meet, we are either attracted or not. Attraction, when pursued, eventually grows into levels of friendship and then may cross the barriers we build up, to protect ourselves, and grow into love.
Romance Matters
You are never too old and it is never too late to romance that special someone whom you love. There are so many things to do and so many ways to do it. So often, we have merely gotten out of the habit.
Very Old Secret To Melt The Heart Of Your Beloved
My Dear Lover,
When Your Relationships Turn Abusive - What You Can Do
Sometimes the people who are the closest to us, our friends and our mates, the ones who should be liking us the best, are the ones who hurt us the most.
If You Cannot Make Friends, Make Foes
There are few desires (if any) stronger than the deep wish to be liked. The first time you realized that not everybody liked you, it was a shock. For most of us it was the first lesson we learned at school, and we needed time to accept it. As hard as it was to discover that loving you was not the main purpose of your classmates, you also learnt to live with it. You took care of your friends and, as long as they did not bully you, you were almost deaf and blind to other people.
Lobster - The Food Of Romantics
Summer has arrived! Woo-Hoo! Do you know what always comes along with summer? Well, besides the bugs! Weddings! Yeap, that's right, Weddings. But I've got an other one for you. Years after all those wedding what else comes in summer? Nooo, not divorce, Anniversaries. All those people who were married are now going to celebrate their Wedding Anniversary. Congrats!
What Keeps Couples Together
There are several things you can do, especially when your relationship is loving and happy, to ensure that it remains this way for the long term. The first principle of a lasting relationship is your clear intention to preserve your mutual affection, respect and friendship.
Dr. John Gottman, a towering figure in couples counseling, achieved this insight after more than thirty years in the research and study of couples. In his bestselling book, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, he discusses why most marriage therapy fails, concluding that resolving conflicts and improving communication is important but not, of itself, what keeps couples together. Rather, he finds that "friendship fuels the flames of romance."
However intense or frequent their battles, the couples that last have never lost their fondness and respect for one anther. After describing the kinds of behavior that undermine mutual regard, Gottman describes seven things that happy marriages have in common, then he shows you how to introduce those seven principles into your own relationship. If ever you feel that the ties that bind are weakening, this would be a good place to start looking for things you can do to rekindle affection. This material is also available in audio or video format.
Other factors that contribute to relationship success include learning to express your feelings, both positive and negative; learning to disagree in ways that are not destructive; and learning to accept things you can't change.
Beyond self-help
Beyond information in books, tapes and videos, there are couple workshops. Some might find it more effective to go directly to a good couples counselor. If one of you is allergic to the idea of counseling or therapy, look for a couples coach, which might be more acceptable. Enter "couples coach" into Google and see what comes up, or ask a recommended therapist to serve as a coach. Many religious organizations have trained conciliators who work with couples and many clergy are trained in couples counseling. In any case, you should only work with someone who is trained, experienced and certified to do the job.
The important thing is that you not sit on your hands if one of you begins to feel that your mutual regard is fading. If you are committed to your relationship, you need to make it a priority, meaning there will be times when you have to put extra effort into it--get information, go to a workshop, get help. Above all, try to discuss things you can do to increase mutual regard and affection and decide together what steps to take.
Relationship Resources
The companion CD that's included in my book Legal Essentials for California Couples has a fine article, How to Get the Most From Couples Therapy. Appendix B in the book lists relationship resources that professionals have told us they recommend to their clients. One we like is The Five Love Languages, by Gary Chapman, who points out that people have different ways of expressing and receiving love, so that one person might be expressing it in a way that the other does not get, as where a man works hard to earn material things for his loved one and buys her gifts, but she craves touching and nice words. It's a matter of getting your signals straight.
Other resources include the highly regarded Couple Communication workshops, which have trained over 600,000 people and are conducted across the U.S. by thousands of certified instructors. To find an instructor near you, visit www.couplecommunication.com. Then there's the respected Marriage Encounter with nation-wide programs for troubled couples that are based on Judeo-Christian concepts, though you need not be religious to participate. You can find more information about them at www.marriage-encounter.org.
There's a mountain of good books, tapes, videos and workshops out there that you can use besides the examples I've given. Time spent on this subject will be richly rewarded. That's the whole point--to make the effort. The most innovative parts of the Couples Contract, featured in Legal Essentials for California Couples, are the agreements you make to take these kinds of actions when your relationship needs some help. The Couples Contract can be used by couples in any state with some minor revisions. To learn more about how the Couples Contract can protect and preserve your relationship, visit www.nolocouples.com.
Copyright 2005 Ed Sherman
Happily Ever After/Real Love
I was 43 years old and still looking for love. I guess I was searching for love in all the wrong places. I just wasn?t finding the man of my dreams, my soul mate, prince charming and mate for life. I thought I had that with Bill, but he turned out to be a poor excuse for a man. The bottom line is you can?t change a man. You can only change yourself in the process.
Emotional Investments
It is a given truth that there are people out there in the world, married and single, who are afraid of allowing any emotional attachment or involvement in a relationship. This is a destructive element inanyone?s life.
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Zen And Romance
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One of the most underrated concepts that most people
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1. It's addictive. Fighting, and the anger that comes with it, kicks off the old fight-or-flight response that prepares us to handle a threat. This produces a kind of energy, or "high." Some people have said that what kept the fighting alive in their relationship was the "juiced" feeling they would get when fighting mad.
Long Distance Love
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When A Two-Salary Income Fails
While this may not apply to everyone, you may find that a second salary brings in substantially less than you thought it would. In the beginning, Rachael thought that since she and her husband were just about breaking even as a couple, that staying home with the new baby would not work -- infant needs seemed endless. So she went back to her old job.
Lingerie Buying Advice For Guys
Buying lingerie for your lover can be one of the most romantic things you can do. It's an intimate gift which, if you get it right, shows you really care, really do understand her and have put the effort in to really think about a gift she will like.
It's also one of the most stressful and dangerous gifts you can buy if you are a guy so don't rush in to it!
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